Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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What is someone called who tunes the instruments for an opera house?

An opera tunist.

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Akiva Lane
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While building his porch, why was Arnie looking for something called 'scratch'?

Because he was building it from scratch.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the loaf of bread feel insecure?

It felt kneady.

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Akiva Lane
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What word means both 'large' and 'disgusting'?

Gross

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a thief that leaves no clues?

Stainless steal.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Arnold arguing with his stomach?

Because he ate something that didn't agree with him.

2007
Akiva Lane
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Why did the general not want to look down at his boots?

He wanted to avoid de feet.

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Akiva Lane
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Why are all shopping malls very similar?

You see one, you see the mall.

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Akiva Lane
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What do longshoremen and medical secretaries have in common?

The both work at the docs.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Liz putting a wedding song as her phone's ring tone?

She wanted a wedding ring.

1911
Akiva Lane
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How does a doctor thank someone for referrals?

Thank you for your patients.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the doctor say when his nurse said there was a man in the waiting room who was disappearing?

Tell him I can't see him now.

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