Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did the seamstress say when she couldn't fix a hole in a sweater?

Oh darn it!

3090
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why couldn't Alan sit in a chair when he worked?

He was a stand-up comedian.

1703
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What happens when a problem is solved twice?

It is resolved.

1977
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do these have in common: a fish in the ocean, doing things well, and a small apartment?

They all involve efficiency.

474
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call a successful young man that hardly ever sleeps?

A son that never sets.

696
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is something called that makes you angry?

A pre-curser.

1921
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is a relative of an air pump called?

A pump kin.

2108
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is it called when someone had a good date, and tells you about it?

An update.

2186
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did the Jones family say after they found their dog named Spot?

We spotted the spot where Spot was, by spotting his spot!

1905
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why couldn't the pony sing?

Because it was a little hoarse.

533
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why didn't Max like racketball?

He thought that people who played it were off the wall.

2594
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What happens to an illegally parked frog?

Toad.

461