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Why did Marsha like to read on the steps of the NY Public Library?

She believed that for meaning, you have to read between the lions.

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Why did Barry's tongue hurt so much?

Each time he felt like saying something wrong, he bit his tongue.

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What country is named after neck-wear?

Tie Land.

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What do you call a dinosaur with feet that hurt?

A dino-sore.

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Why was Jim happy that after dieting he fit into his old clothes?

He knew that when it comes to dieting, it's survival of the fit-est.

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What is a fancy expensive scale called?

Upscale.

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Why did the people playing poker surround themselves with bushes?

They wanted to hedge their bets.

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What Chinese dynasty was known for everyone trying to be the same?

The Sem Ting Dynasty.

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What do students in 12th grade have in common with people in an old-age home?

They are both seniors.

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Why didn't Joe like running at the track?

He felt like he was just running around in circles.

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How did Helvetica respond when someone suggested that she go out with Times New Roman?

He's not my type.

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When you trade in an old bike for a new bike, what is that called?

Re-cycling.

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