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What did Fred say to the driver of the car that hit his car from the back?

You're a pain in the rear end.

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What do you call a holy man who walks barefoot and has bad breath from fasting so much?

A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

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What is someone who can keep a secret called?

A secretary.

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What can be said about Edison's invention of the light bulb?

Both Edison and the light bulb were brilliant.

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What is not a good season for Rome?

Fall.

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How did the geometry teacher feel when she saw her children teaching geometry to her grandchildren?

She felt that life had come full circle.

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Why do we peel fruit?

If fruit has a peel, it doesn't have appeal.

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What's it called if you spend loads of time with loads of friends?

Frenzy.

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Why don't elephants get upset very often?

They have thick skin.

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What vegetables were on strike?

The onions, because they were onion-ized.

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When happened when the Brady family's boy couldn't sleep on their trip to Alaska?

It was the land of the midnight son.

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When you add up numbers, and are amazed at the result, what is that called?

Awe sum.

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