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Akiva Lane
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Why did Janet eat from a bag of dates when she talked to Joe at work?

She wanted him to ask her for a date.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jill buy a Jiffy car?

Because she wanted to go places and come back in a jiffy.

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Akiva Lane
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What can be said about people who work around the clock?

They are shiftless.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Billy write in all capital letters?

He wanted to practice being a Capitalist.

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What is clothing from Italy called?

Italian dressing.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call blue-berries that are in a container underground?

Buried berries.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the insulted person steal a fence?

Because he took offense.

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Akiva Lane
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What Beatles song is about a bee in a vegetable garden?

Lettuce bee.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Alan not sure he liked playing trumpet in the band?

Because afterwards he felt like he blew it.

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Akiva Lane
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What is confusing about alarms that get activated?

Do alarms go off, or do they go on?

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Akiva Lane
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What colored letter does not want to wait?

Red D.

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Akiva Lane
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What was it called when Grace tossed a pea pod to someone she wanted to stop arguing with?

A pod cast to start a peas process.

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