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Akiva Lane
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How did the smoker, who craved a cigarette, feel when he got to smoke one?

Nicotine in the nick of time.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the waiter say when the customer sent the food back to the kitchen?

Thanks for the feedback.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the rancher say to the person he thought was taking down parts of his fence?

I'm accusing you, but I hope you don't take offence.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jim feel bad when he heard that the US will stop making pennies?

He thought it didn't make cents.

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Akiva Lane
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When Natalie was sick, why did she touch the water well?

She wanted to feel well.

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Akiva Lane
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What crime does this describe?

Assault and battery.

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What is a book called that is a collection of reviews about the movie Psycho?

Psycho Analysis

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What is a partnership of 2 doctors called?

A pair-a-dox.

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What vegetable makes the most polite request?

Let us.

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Why is it difficult to build submarines?

Whatever you build is sub-standard.

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Why are visitors to the zoo sometimes directed by mistake to the room with the bats?

People think they asked where the bat room is.

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What did the law student who liked liquor knew he had to do?

He had to pass the bar in order to pass the bar.

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