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Akiva Lane
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Why do shoes sneeze when they get hot?

They become hot-shoes!

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Where do pharmaceuticals go that don't need a prescriptinon?

They're over the counter.

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What is someone called who can't stop weaving on a loom?

A loomatic.

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Did Sodom and Gomorrah deserve their punishment?

Moral less.

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What is something that someone catches, that then causes something else to run?

When a person catches a cold, their nose starts to run.

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What's in back of the back of a person?

The front of the person.

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How did Bill feel when none of the off-switches for the lights worked?

He felt that they were all up-settings.

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What type of granite is always red?

A pomegranate.

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What is the government official in charge of the fence called?

The Minister of De Fence.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Martha lose weight when she ate vegetables?

Because they took away her appetite.

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What excuse can be used by a person who drinks too much?

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy.

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Akiva Lane
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If a hiker meets in the woods a large bear on the left and a small bear on the right, what should he do?

Bear right.

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