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Why did Rose like the weekend?

Because the weekdays made her weak, and the weekend made her strong again.

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Why did Martha not appreciate her beautiful kitchen counters?

She took it for granite.

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How did Beverly feel with all the dirty dishes in the sink?

Dish-organized.

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What symbol is written before it is pronounced?

The dollar sign.

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Why did Sam sing while he built houses?

He wanted to build them soundly.

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What did the large fan say to the girl holding it?

I'm one of your biggest fans.

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What gift does the soccer player not like to receive?

He doesn't like ties, he prefers to get victories.

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Why did Dan double the size of the pockets on his pants?

He was told that to afford everything, he needed deep pockets.

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What is something that many bathrooms don't have?

A bath.

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How did Mr. and Mrs. Tern express their appreciation for each other?

One good Tern deserves another.

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What do you call a piece of pottery in the shape of a duck?

A quack pot.

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What do taxi companies and computer devices have in common?

They both use drivers.

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