Pictures:

What is a survey about telephone usage called?

A telephone poll.

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Why did Arlene buy a rug?

She had some problems that she wanted to sweep under it.

1884

What do great track stars and confused people have in common?

They run around in circles.

2128

What do you call someone who drives and flies a car-plane?

An auto-pilot.

1412

What is the time called after mailing a letter?

Post post.

1903

What's the combination of a man and a lima bean?

A human bean.

1748

Why did Bill take sleeping lessons?

He wanted to sleep well.

2309

What do you call someone who is against hypocrisy?

A faux foe.

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What does an orchestra and a destructive mob have in common?

They both have violins.

2066

What do you call a broken can opener?

A can't opener.

3145

What did Mr. Cow say to Mrs. Cow when it started pouring rain?

I Noah ark we can use.

700

Why did Joe, in his new job, feel like the wheels of a car?

He felt tired and under pressure.

943