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What do dentists never tell their patients?

Keep your mouth shut.

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What is a good name for a company that certifies bones for dogs to chew on?

Bone-a-fide

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How is the political system similar to the pages in a book?

Because everything is either justified right or justified left.

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What gets larger as the things they represent get smaller?

The numbers associated with roads (highway 1 is larger than higher 4325)

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Why did Bob join the tug-of-war team?

He wanted to meet people who had a lot of pull.

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How is a person who is looking for parking like Lady Macbeth?

He feels like saying 'Out out damn spot'!

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Why was Fred confused by forms?

Because he didn't know if he should fill them IN or fill them OUT.

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If two eyes are labeled A and B, what eye is smarter?

A Eye

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What are the simplest 2 letters of the alphabet?

EZ

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What is the air-conditioning system in a baseball stadium called?

Baseball fans.

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Why did Martha like circles?

Because it has the best all-around shape.

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If something is furbished twice, what does it become?

Refurbished.

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