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Akiva Lane
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What do labor unions have to do with your son's friends sleeping over?

Boy cots.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the people realize that calling their town Competent was not a good idea?

Then all the people in the town would be in Competent.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe a person's writing that has lots of verbs?

It re-verb-erates.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the magician do when he was very tired?

He drank coffee, and that did the trick.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call machines that sand down the surface of kernals of grain?

Kernal sanders.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Amanda surprised that this perfume was so expensive?

She was told it was worth a red scent.

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What award did the farmer receive?

He was the best in his field.

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Why did Beverly change from being an accountant to a singing teacher?

She found she was very good with in-voices.

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When the phone caller said 'I hope I'm not disturbing you', how did Andy respond?

Andy said, "You can't disturb me, because I'm already disturbed".

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Akiva Lane
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How did cell phones get their name?

Because if we're not careful, they can imprison us.

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Where is a runner from when he stops running?

Iran.

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Akiva Lane
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Does the Moot Pencil Company make very sharp pencils?

That's a moot point.

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