Pictures:

Shane Ronay
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What did the procrastinator tell those who said he'd never get anywhere?

"You just wait!"

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Shane Ronay
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What did Mount Rushmore look like before it was carved?

Un-presidented.

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Shane Ronay
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Why did the mother have sore hands?

She had meta-carpools.

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Shane Ronay
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What is the first phase of a liver transplant called?

De-livery

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Shane Ronay
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Which business finds emergency replacement musicians?

Band Aid

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Shane Ronay
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Why do some people choose to do mixed martial arts?

Just for kicks.

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Shane Ronay
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Who's bigger - Mr. Bigger, or Mr. Bigger's baby, and why?

Mr. Bigger's baby, because he's a little Bigger.

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Shane Ronay
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Why are there so many types of Asian cuisine?

For different woks of life.

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Shane Ronay
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Why did Tom get fired from the kitchen hardware business?

He couldn't get a handle on it.

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Shane Ronay
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How would you refer to your dog-sitting neighbor that lost your pet?

Your dog gone neighbor.

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Shane Ronay
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What are "octopy"?

Pizzas topped with calamari.

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Shane Ronay
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What type of person uses oxygen bleach to brush his teeth?

An oxymoron

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