Pictures:

What does a lawyer wear to a trial?

A law suit.

2084

What device do psychologists use to measure positive emotions?

An Oh!dometer

840

What happens to an illegally parked frog?

Toad.

461

How did Jack refer to the current day when he finished work?

He called it a day.

1214

What is a good motto for a sausage company?

We make the best wurst.

1032

What is someone who can keep a secret called?

A secretary.

735

Why is a Phillips-head screwdriver so popular?

People see it as a plus.

1403

Why did the man travel to India for a corned beef sandwich?

He heard they had a new Delhi.

292

What happens every year in the universe?

We celebrate its universe-ary.

3103

Why is laughing out loud forbidden in Hawaii?

It's a low ha state.

1909

Why did Beverly go to a therapist?

She felt her complexes were very complex.

1864

What do discount stores and farewell parties have in common?

They have a lot of good buys.

2459