Pictures:

How did Alan feel when he put down the heavy box of cucumbers?

Un-encumbered.

166

What seeds are named after fathers?

Poppy seeds.

2612

Why is this very useful?

Because people say they'll do things when they get a round tuit.

1610

Why did the programmer call an exterminator?

Because he had a bug in his program.

722

What did they say about the king who was only 12 inches tall?

He was an excellent ruler.

3209

What does the Eiffel Tower have in common with a tick?

They are both Paris sights.

1875

Why is this large gun a better value than smaller ones?

It provides a bigger bang for your buck.

1268

What starts with P and ends with E and has thousands of letters.

Post Office.

956

What does a hiker sleep on?

A nap-sack.

324

What is a child called that walks and talks?

A walkie talkie.

2067

Why didn't the cat go to the doctor?

It was feline fine.

1756

Why did George make a large model of a dime?

Because he wanted to learn how to fall asleep on a dime.

907