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At what kind of table does one read the New York Times?

The Times table.

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What is an insect that hums?

Humbug.

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What kind of money can't be understood?

Non cents.

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What was the zoo like when all the bears were sent to a different zoo?

It was unbearable.

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Why did Arnold use gloves when painting with red paint?

He didn't want to be caught red handed.

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How did Sarah feel about not getting concert tickets to see her favorite band?

She found it dis-concerting.

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What do you call flies that are attracted to the smell of thyme?

Thyme flies.

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What 5 letters are just empty energy?

MTNRG

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What country is named after neck-wear?

Tie Land.

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What is a side-trip on a vacation called?

A detour on de tour.

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What is it called when parents provide good guidance for their children?

Power steering.

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How did the American Indians feel about transporting things by travois.

It was a drag.

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