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Shane Ronay
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Why was the son of a drapery store owner upset when flunking out of college?

He knew it was curtains for him.

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Shane Ronay
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What type of meeting is this?

A Piece Summit.

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Akiva Lane
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Why are people who used to be perts very smart?

Because they are ex-perts.

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What part of Queens, New York needs the most water?

Flushing.

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What did the father tell his son who wanted to travel?

Roam wasn't built in a day.

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What did the thread say to the needle?

I'm just passing through.

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What is the heaviest Chinese soup?

One Ton soup.

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What do air conditioning installers do to save space?

They get all their ducts lined up.

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What is a cold part of South America?

Chile.

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Why should we be careful about illusions?

Because it begins with the word 'ill'.

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How can you help people who are suspicious?

Change the first letter of suspicious from S to A, to make it auspicious.

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Why did King Louis XV say, "After me comes the flood"?

He reigned for 59 years, and King Louis XIV reigned for 72 years, and after all that reigning, of course there would be a flood!

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