Pictures:

What do discount stores and farewell parties have in common?

They have a lot of good buys.

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What is someone called who tunes the instruments for an opera house?

An opera tunist.

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Why are people who used to be perts very smart?

Because they are ex-perts.

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What is it called when a city is overrun by cats?

A cat-astrophe.

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What is it called when a parrot chews off and swallows the weak end of a stick?

A weekend in parrots.

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What kind of bird doesn't sing, but only hums?

A hummingbird.

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How did Gary build a successful drainpipe business?

Having his mind in the gutter.

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What do you call someone who drives and flies a car-plane?

An auto-pilot.

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What's the source of a pig's pink color?

Pigment.

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What do you call a delicatessen in a mental hospital?

A psycho deli.

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Why are bakery employees so nice to their customers?

They know where their bread is buttered.

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Why didn't Jerry want to buy a car without a clutch?

He regarded it as shiftless.

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