Pictures:

What is the status of one's yard after cleaning up after the dog?

It's dooty-free.

1009

Why did Bill buy 2 pieces of chord, and gave one to his girlfriend?

He wanted to tie the knot.

1914

Why did George sell his barber shop?

He found cleaning it to be a hair-raising experience.

871

What is a machine called that helps bulls go to sleep?

A bull dozer.

1353

How did Billy feel when he blew out the candles on his birthday cake?

He was delighted.

3059

What kind of horse involves aching muscles?

A charlie horse.

2868

What is similar between a worn out tire and getting social security?

It may be time to retire.

3143

When you put chili sauce in the refrigerator in Santiago, what does it become?

Chile chilly chili sauce.

1399

What is the name of the rock band that sings about failure?

Rock Bottom

3053

If bored people chose a leader, what would the postion be called?

Chairman of the bored.

2092

What does a lawyer wear to a trial?

A law suit.

2084

What time is this?

A quarter after 5.

2727