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How did John feel when his alarm clock woke him up?

He found it alarming.

112

Why is it hard to organize a professional hide-and-seek tournament?

Good players are hard to find.

972

What was obvious to everyone, but no one dared mention?

The elephant in the room.

269

What does a cell phone and a gold ring have in common?

They both have a ring tone.

3040

What is a motto of a podiatrist?

We succeed with de feet.

320

Why did Liz putting a wedding song as her phone's ring tone?

She wanted a wedding ring.

1911

Why did Marla always start walking with her right foot?

She wanted to put her best foot forward.

365

How could Ami know for sure there was an odor in the room?

She just nose.

783

What did the vegetarian say to the salami?

You are THE wurst.

2825

What psychiatric tool is similar the noses of hippies?

Hip noses.

1638

What con-man conquered a large part of Asia?

Genghis Con

56

What are groups called that claim they know all the facts?

Factions.

3015